Life in Boarding School (Part 2)

I have share some of my experiences of the first day in boarding school in the previous post. (Life in Boarding School - Part 1).

As far as i have come to know, there isn't many chinese parents especially, willing to send their children far away from home for study.

They have this one kind of mentality. They think that If they sent their kids to a boarding school, their kids will grew some mouthstache, got circumcised, and get converted within the next 1 week and looked like Osama on return upon graduation.

So, i feel like i have the call for duty to share with you on the life in a boarding school - from a Chinese boy perspective.

The schedule or routine in a boarding school can be described in one word - The Kenny Sia Way. (When Routine isn't exactly normal).

5.30am - Woke up from bed, heading to shower. Cursing while showering on why there isn't any water heaters being made available.

6.30am - "Roll Call" aka gathering infront of school main building, to sing Negaraku and occasionally, fingernails and hair inspection. Entitled a free haircut if selected. Hairstyle? Only one - Go Bald.

7.30 am until 1pm - Class Started.

1pm-2pm - Lunch.

3pm-5pm - "Prep Class"

5.30 - 6.30 - Outdoor activities/sports/anything that sweat you off.

7pm - Dinner time. Ma de. Ikan Besi again. (The so called "iron fish" nicknamed because the fish is so hard that it felt like a stone.

8pm-10pm - Prep Class again.

This routine will get repeated over and over again for every week. We get the chance for an outing only on Saturday, and Sunday for the church-goers only. Once we were out from school, rules are still applied as you must wear your school uniform and Batik shirt only.

That's the only day that i know my Muslims friends dreamed to get converted to become a Christian.

Thinking back it was so insane. I still remembered i saw my friend hiding in a supermarket just because she is wearing her jeans and tops during the outing, and so happened that our discipline teacher is on the round. (Note: On a SPOT CHECK round in bloody PARKSON??). If you get caught, you are grounded for the next two weeks.

This is what we do for the five long years. Yes, you heard me.

Over the next five years, my life is only filled with books. Occasionally with fights which i try to avoid unless i have to enter my self defense.

But it also turn me in to a big boy ever since. Come what may, i will get through that. Punches? No problem. Bullies? Bring it on. Wash my own underwear? How i wish i could have a washine machine there.

As it was fully sponsored by government, you have to be smart in some ways to keep your spot. Straight As? Thats your job. SPM Grade 1, good work. Other than that are considered as failures. This doesn't goes down too well to my cousin when i told them about this. They always treated me like the most intelligent man on the planet. And they think i could build a space craft out of my bare hands, whatever.

While writing this, i asked myself if given a chance would i go back to boarding school again?

Definitely a YES.

It is not a luxury, but more of a growing up process that not everyone can get in their lifetime. Afterall it is free of charge!

And it doesn't turn me into Osama anyway.

Eherm..4S?

My friends tend to laugh at me whenever i told them iphone 4 is shit and 4S is a total humiliation.



Friends: Eh, faster la change your 3Gs to 4S!! When want to change??

Me: Eh no money la, and it is not neccesary at all...

Friends: Why? It is the final touch from Steve Jobs, as his supporter you should keep it in the memory of him!

Me: You tell me la, whats so great about Iphone 4s?? Tell me la now! I don't think there's so much difference compared to the previous iphone! Better Camera and come with the stupid Siri only!!!

(The arguments go on and on)

I am thinking of waiting for Iphone 5 actually. Rumors that it will come out before the end of this year.

To be honest, iphone 4 s to me is really bad. So bad that i think it is exactly the same twins as the iphone 4, only of a different gender and come with a woman voice.

I do not understand the hype around the 4s too. It is just because that Steve has died, thats why people are rushing to get one? IT is not free after all!

I think it is really stupid loh to spend a couple of grand just to get a phone "duplicated" from the previous version loh!

Even more so spending a few hours queing up just to get my hand on the phone loh! I would rather sleep at home right?

Why got so many stupid people one???

But.....

Ta ma de.

*&^%$#@

I "accidentally" bought it.

Because i think there's no other better phone outside that actually can have cyber-s*x with you.



Paiseh ar...LOL!!!

Most embarassing moments

When is the last time you did something that you feel so embarrased that you think you should just immersed your head into the nearest toilet bowl?

It happened to me a couple of weeks ago.

You know, some people used to tell us that there are at least seven other people in this world would look exactly like yourself.

Last week, i was doing my part time job doing some property viewing when i noticed this one guy from far. Well, looks like a friend of mine.

And so happened that he is coming from the industry of home security and alarm, as a service provider, i think it will not be a surprise if he is waiting for his customers there.

So, i smiled at him and waved my hand like an exciting kid towards his direction.

As i walked towards him, nearer..

OWHMYFARKINGGOWD.

KNNCCB.

That's not him.

Don't asked me what happened next.

Luckily there were no toilet bowls nearby.

I swear that the two guys did really give me the "I feel so sorry for you" kind of look.

What Anger Can Do to You

I used to be a real angry kid.

So angry that:

1. During secondary school, people threw me oranges, i replied with punches and chairs.

2. When a woman shouted at my mum, i scratched her car with a coin.

3. When my father shout at me, i shouted back.

(And of course) ended up with broomstick up my ars*.

So now you can see, i am a real certified angry kid.

When you are young, you are hot-headed and sometimes your brain my just wired at the wrong place. (Like in your mouth). When you lose your temper, emotion take over. And depending on the situation, you may ended up like this guy.

A guy named Danny, who accidentally got punches instead of his KFC snack plate.

Seriously, i never knew that two person can fight over a "chicken" issue. If it is about "chicks" that would be an entire different story.

And definitely not a headline in Harian Metro or The Star newspaper.

Somehow, i think KFC could expand their business in sports too.

What do you think?

It proves that even a small matter can trigger such a big reaction from the KFC staff who allegedly try to knock Danny out with a steel bar. (Hey man, it is only a chicken! What the furk?)

If it is because Danny threatened the staff that he would shoved the chicken into his butt, thats a totally different story lah~!

When emotion took over, sometimes it is not only punches are thrown.

Meet Jessie Ooi, the representative from MCA during a Q & A session at the Chua Soi Lek Vs Lim Guan Eng debate.

This is really a classic. For those of you who have yet to know what happened here, let me share with you the video from youtube.



This shows how stupid a person can be when they lose their head in the heat of the moment.

Lesson learnt?

Be smart. Be cool.

No matter how people try to wind you up, just smile and walk away as if nothing happened.

Unless you want to take the punches or "suddenly" becoming the joke of the nation.

I think i wouldn't mind if a woman like Jessie come and tow my car away in Puchong.

Will you tow my car please?

Shanghai 1943

There were a few types of artists, which can be categorized under the following group.

The "Handsome" category such as Wang Lee Hom.
The "Great vocalist" Category such as Jacky Cheung.

My type of favourite artist? He is neither handsome or a great vocalist.

His look is ordinary.

The way he sing sometimes sounds like chicken rapping on the Eminem's.

But this song remained as one of my all (old) time favourite. Jay Chou - Shanghai 1943.

This is what i called, the beautiful song.





Enjoy!

阿公走了

On the 12th February 2012, he left us.

My grandad passed away peacefully after saying goodbye to all of his son. Unfortunately, my dad could only heard the very last word from him via mobile.

All of us grandson used to call him "Ah Gong"- 阿公 all this while, especially myself, has been real close to him.

He used to teach me how to fish, beside the old wooden house by the river when i was barely 6 year old. He says "At least if you could not study, you can still become a fisherman".

But he knew he was wrong. His grandson is a straight As student for the next 9 years.

He never scold us, but always provide us with advise on how to be a better person in life. Never cheat, be honest and kind to everyone, he used to tell me.

He is a chain smoker and drinker, but always tell us not to be one.

When i am 15, knowing that he couldn't drive properly due to loss in sight, still insist to pick me up in his old car from my boarding school, just to make sure that i can spend over a weekend with him.

When i was in uni, knowing that he loved coffee, i brought him to Starbucks. Big mistake. Not only the coffee did not suit his taste, he thought that Starbucks cheated my money for overcharge on a single cup of coffee.

When i started work, on and off i will give him some pocket money of couple of hundreds whenever i see him. The last time i gave him, is the day i knew he contracted cancer, he cried in front of me for the first time in my life.

I still managed to visit him one more time after that, it is such a relief that he looked much better and healthier. He told me, "Faster get married while i am still around to witness your wedding".

I still remembered i replied him, "Don't have to worry, you gonna live for another 50 more years!"

Then it comes. Got a missed call and message from my mum one early saturday morning.

"Your 阿公left already".

I didn't cry. But deep in my heart i knew that i am gonna miss him badly.

阿公，do take care of yourself up there. All of us gonna missed you badly.

If you are bored up there, do surf my blog once in a while. Up there sure got Unifi one. :)

How to increase your bank account balance, without using real money

People used to label an engineer as "boring, no life, and someone who get orgasm while dealing with autocad" kind of person.

But we can't deny one thing, that engineers, most of them are smart.




I am an engineer myself, so i would like to put myself into the category of "smart-asses".

And i will show you why.

It is because recently i have come to figuring out on how to alter your bank account balance at will. Do not get panic and excited first, cos' i will show you the way, step by step.

Most of us would have a ATM card.




And by now, you should have an iphone with you.

First and foremost, keep this two item side by side for approximately 5 minutes while you are staring at them.


Then, start to key in the figure that you wish to have in your account bank balance.

In my case, i don't want to be too greedy, become a millionaire will do for me at this moment of time. (Note: Do not press dial or save or anything like that).

Once you are done, key in the "#" button.



Next, put your card on top of your iphone screen. The card should be aligned in such a way that the back of the card should touch the screen.

Now, wait for another five minutes.




One minute.............


Two minute.......


Three minute.......


Four minute............


Five minute........


Ok, now you should go to the nearest branch or ATM to verify the new balance of your account.

................................
................................

................................
................................

Did i mentioned that engineer's are good in:

1. Conning people
2. Wasting people's time (In this case, i just wasted ten minutes of your time)

and most importantly, we still posses a sense of humor?

To those of your who really go as far as to check the balance of your bank account from the nearest branch, well, eherm...ok. I have no comments really.

Sorry, it was just another boring Friday night.

Last but not least.





This one you agree?

My Favourite drink

I still remembered when i was a kid, during CNY i used to finish up bottle after bottle of soya bean until i feel like wanted to vomit.

I kind of stop the habit when i started work, as drinking soya bean is not "macho" anymore.

When people asked me what's my favourite drinks? I would say something like "Paulenar" or "Corona", sounds more macho ma like that.

Recently when no one is around, i sneaked up to Speedmart 99 to buy a few packs (Note: Few packs) of Home Soy.

I must say. Homesoy is always the best.

Why am i saying so?





Because it says "Consume within 3 days".

All i need is 3 hours.

FML.

Will i turn in to a cow??

Order 2 only, but getting 26 Serving plates...

"날 좀 먹어!!!"

Unless you are a korean drama extremist or a fans of the "super-whatever-junior" it is, i don't think you will know exactly what that chracter means.

Just to ease your curiosity, that means "F*** me" in Korean. Or at least the google translate says so).

During the weekend me and my friend decided to have some dinner and drinks over in Solaris Mont Kiara. But we have a problem.

Solaris in Mont kiara is a nice place to go when:

1. You bring your wife/grilfriend/crush.

2. A group of friend for dinner/drinks/party.

But the thing is, i am going with a guy and we are not going to end up into a place like "michelangelo" restaurant with a candle sticking out in the middle of the dining table if you know what i mean.

So, we decided to visit a Korean Restaurant.

At least if some Korean insulted us as gay, we can beat the "Kimchi" out of them!

This is the Apgujeong restaurant. Situated at the first floor on the Soho KL. The set up is not that impressive, the only attraction is you may see a lots of Korean chicks over here.

Apgujeong 狎鸥亭 - A name inspired from a well known district in Gangnam of Seoul, Apgujeong Restaurant offers authentic Korean recipes with contemporary ingredients and tastes.

I will not go into details about how the food taste or what is their signature dishes. But one thing i need to address is their professionalism in carrying their duty as a waiter.

In Malaysia, you don't actually see a waiter RUNNING towards you (almost tripping over) when you call them right?

What you normally get when you call the waiter in mamak..is this..

Me: Can you tell us what is your signature dishes over here? Which one is the best?

Waiter: Everything here is the best!

Me and Friend: ??!!!

The best thing is, we and my friend each ordered a set of spicy beef c/w soup and rice kind of servings. But this is what we got.

"날 좀 먹어!!!

How on earth is that we have ordered just 2 servings from the menu, and ended up getting a total of 26 other plates of servings??




And with the price we are paying, we are paying only for 2 dishes to be exact!

So now i learnt one thing about the Korean.



They love washing plates!!

Oh My Gawd

If you happened to be a Sarawakian, you may recognize this face.

I am pleased to introduced her (Eherm)...her to you. Jessie Chung Jie Xi.

Her original name is Zhong Xuan Tai. (You did not get me still?)

Cough* Ok, she is originally a HE. The gender transition was taken place in the year of 2008 as far as i knew. A very smart student, she graduated as a American Naturopathic Doctor and now leads a quite reknown health therapy business in Kuala Lumpur.

Well lets put this straight. I am not a person who is against sexual transition, as long as it does not happen to my dad.

In fact, to some extent i am quite impressed with her courage and balls deciding to cut off eherm.."the balls she (he) had".

But the day he told the press that her husband to be is a Daniel Wu Look alike, not only she pissed me off. Also the entire Daniel Wu female fans across the world.

This is her husband.

And this is Daniel Wu, ok?

Maybe what she meant is Daniel Ngu, not Wu...

Well, for some reason, i am quite upset with her ever since. But i can't explain why.

It is more like, "Hey look at me! I have had surgery and now i am damn BEAUTIFUL! AND my husband LOOKS LIKE DANIEL WU!!"

As expected, the moment the press came up with the picture of her husband, Joshua, everybody including me, almost dropped our pants off.

What can i say?

And now, i am even more upset after i saw this video.




Seriously, i would not put her video on my telly during CNY.

I am not risking everyone started running and puking around my house.

When her CNY video first came out..

I almost turn into a horse...

Okok...you may say i am biased.

But listen and watch that video yourself. Watch how she shake her butt.

No offense, but to anyone who disagree with me, everyone are entitled to their opinion.

At least to me, the mv helps me when i have a bad constipation.

Somebody please kill me. (For being so mean).